5.23.2013

Random Thoughts

This post may end up being all over the place, but I have lots of thoughts going through my mind right now that I want to get out of my head...


  • It's been a cruel week in blog land.  There's been a lot of BFNs after treatments, cancelled cycles, slowly rising betas causing uncertainty, difficult decisions,  etc.  So many people to keep in my thoughts and prayers.  Infertility can just go suck it.  
  • Over the last year or so, I've met an amazing group of women, all facing infertility.  My acupuncturist started a local peer group that meets once a month and it's been so therapeutic to me.  I'm so thankful to be a part of it.  One of the ladies I've gotten to know in particular, is going through her second miscarriage of this year, after their third IVF cycle.  Things just keep going wrong for her and her husband and it makes me angry. This week, she had an ultrasound at our local clinic and they treated her poorly (from my perspective), being sloppy and  leaving lots of questions unanswered.  Today they had another ultrasound hoping to get answers, which they did, but they weren't good answers.  My heart just hurts so much for her.  I feel so helpless in these situations.  There are no words or actions to make it better.  
  • As I hear more and more stories from my peer group members, I get more and more upset about how our local clinic treats their patients.  They are the only clinic in the city and they have the market share. To find another RE would be at least 2 hours away.  I feel like they have just become callused to the work they do, and are losing any sense of compassion and caring -- it seems they are just moving people through.  My husband and I were never big fans of the clinic from the start, but I have to say that I'm quite happy we will NEVER have to go there again.  (of course I'm thankful for them, otherwise we would not be pregnant right now, but I am so not impressed with how they are treating my friends!)
  • While I really hope I make it to my due date in 4 weeks, I am seriously ready to be done with work.  I want to work as long as I can so I can enjoy my time off after baby is born, but there have been days I'm just ready to throw in the towel and be done for 12 weeks.  
  • I'm sad to think this pregnancy is coming to an end.  Yes, I am so excited to meet baby and see what he/she looks like, but I am so going to miss the kicks and jabs and my big ole belly!  
  • On a cute and much lighter note, we visited our nieces this weekend and I asked our 8 year-old niece if she had any boy names that we should consider.  She looked at me with a dead serious look in her eye and said "why do you need a boy's name -- the baby is a girl."  It's hard to argue with such fierce determination!  
I hope everyone has a great long weeked!

2 comments:

  1. Thank you so very much for being so compassionate. And nothing in the world makes me less than thrilled for you, and the blessing that you and your husband are going to meet so very soon! I know you'll cover him or her with kisses right away, and just be sure to do it on behalf of all the others that you referenced in your post too :)

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  2. I felt that way about my first OB and about some of the nurses at my first RE's office -- they'd lost some sense of compassion and caring. I had to move on.

    Thinking of you and your big ole belly!

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